A Rap on the subject of Hipsters.

A rap song I wrote to the song ‘Ridin Dirty’ by Chamillionaire, on the subject of hipsters:

 

They see me scrollin’ (On Tumblr)

They Hipster, Patrollin and tryn catch me riding mainstream

Tryna catch me riding mainstream (x4)

My music so new, you ain’t heard

They hopin’ that they gone catch me ridin’ mainstream

Tryna catch me riding mainstream (x4)

 

One time I caught me a bream

It’s a metaphor for the mainstream

See ma bike ride, see ma lights beam

Savin’ the planet Ima hipster machine

Riding with organic veg I’m like hold up

Next to my scrolla controlla

Not enough mousse in my moustacha

Fetch me some product and a coma

Wear second hand clothes like from an orphan home

It’s vintage bitch, jeans tight like skin tryna get me some

And I like old movies cause I view the irony

Despite glasses (without glass) don’t do shit to help me see,

It seems contradictory,

Different yet other hipsters look exactly the same as me,

It’s like a f*cked up philosophy,

Prove society ain’t the boss of me

Wear a branded t shirt?

I’d rather have a frickin colonoscopy,

And look at my triangle- symbol of my faith,

It’s equilateral man,

 area equals height times half base

Iva non-conforming pale little face

Cram my books in a satchel bag, cause other guys use a brief case.

I hate anything liked, by the majority of the human race.

 

They see me scrollin’ (On Tumblr)

They Hipster, Patrollin and tryn catch me riding mainstream

Tryna catch me riding mainstream (x4)

My music so new, you ain’t heard

They hopin’ that they gone catch me ridin’ mainstream

Tryna catch me riding mainstream (x4)

 

Munching a biscotti,

On my mac in starbucks,

I’d try and blow juice up my straw

Cause everyone else sucks

Researching a thing

Omniscient God’s never heard of

Pondering the silence,

Stroking ma moustaaaache,

The only book my face is on,

Is a vintage gothic novella,

See I deleted my account,

Cause too many friends were on there too yeah

See the others are all stuck

Up the mainstream creek without a paddle,

I’d dive in and save ya’ll,

But I’m wearing too much goddam flannel

It’s a battle, I’m a judge,

Bet you’ve never been attacked with a gavel

Yeah I won’t drive by, my bike

Is how I like to travel.

And I like reblogging pictures,

Backdropping irrelevant phrases,

It’s how I spend my nights,

And some of my dayses,

Now this is done it’s final,

I own this shit on vinyl,

And when I trip I Tumblr cause that is just my styyyle.